Linxi Zhu
NONE OF YOUR BEEZWACKS
TEACHER: Why didn't you study?
STUDENT: A year has 365 days for you to
study.
After taking away 52 Sundays, there are
only 313
days left. There are 50 days in the summer
that
is way too hot to work so there are only
263 days
left. We sleep 8 hours a day, in a year, that
counts up to 122 days so now we're left
with 141 days. If we fooled around for
only 1 hour a day, 15 days are gone, so we
are left
with 126 days. We spend 2 hours eating
each
day, 30 days are used in this way in the
year, and we are left with
96 days in our year. We spend 1 hour a
day speaking to friends and family, that
takes away 15 days more and we are left
with 81 days.
Exams and tests take up at least
35 days in your
year; hence you are only left with
46 days. Taking
off approximately 40 days of
holidays, you are
only left with 6 days. Say you are
sick for a
minimum of 3 days; you're left
with 3 days in the
year to study! Let's say you only
go out for 2
days...You're left with 1 day. But
that 1 day is
your birthday. That's why I did
not study.
Teacher: Class dismissed
Now, why does everything have to be about me? Let's talk about you!
Whether you like it or not, I know a lot about you. For example, below are
ten things I know about you:
1. You are alive.
2. You can breathe.
4. You didn't notice that I skipped number 3.
5. You just went back to check.
6. You are smiling at how you keep on falling for this.
7. You just read this sentence.
8. And you just missed that I skipped number 7!
9. You just went back to check only to realize I didn't skip anything! 
10. You think you are done!
11. You forgot I skipped the 3 and you think that I accidentally added an extra one
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